Lessons learned by accident

Two days ago I was involved in a car accident. I was waiting at a signal, having just come to a stop, when a speeding taxi crashed into me from behind. This caused a four car pile-up behind me, bringing the traffic on that road to a standstill. It happened fast - I heard the squeal of tires behind me, a resounding thud and glass shattering. As I was putting my car into Park mode to get out and survey the damage I heard more tires squealing and more bangs.

 

Coming around the side of my car I saw that the taxi had taken a severe hammering with the bonnet crumpled and headlights shattered. My car's rear bumper had been pushed in and badly dented and I could see a few more cars behind the taxi with their drivers getting out to inspect the damage. It did not seem as if there were any injuries and for that I was thankful.

 

But that day I learnt a few things.

 

Runaround

 

I learnt that it is important to have the Police number stored on your cell-phone – I did not.

 

In case of an accident the rule (as I remembered it) was that you wait at the spot till the police arrive. This could be anything from a few minutes to a couple of hours. After taking the number from the taxi driver I called the Police and the first thing the dispatcher asked was whether there were any injuries. After taking the details he told me to wait.

 

It seemed that we were fortunate, as a patrolling officer arrived on the scene very shortly. He immediately asked us to move our vehicles into a by lane. Considering the fact that we were in the fast lane and the sorry state of some of the vehicles, that was easier said than done. It took almost ten minutes for all four cars to limp into the feeder lane. Having done so, the cop walked around and surveyed the vehicles for nano-seconds and then told us to go to the nearest Police Station. I could not understand why he could not have told us to do that in the first place!

 

The other guys who had probably been in this situation more times than myself were more astute and started to protest. They pleaded with him to sort out the paperwork on the spot, as it was an open and shut case with no disputes. But this guy would not budge - he did not want to do the paperwork and wanted to clear his area. He told us that there was a huge accident elsewhere and it would take a couple of hours for any police to arrive. At this point one of the guys started to throw a tantrum, refusing to budge, cajoling and haranguing the police officer. It seemed he was expected for a meeting at work and wanted to leave.

 

 

Anyway being given no option we winced our way (in a convoy) to the Police Station. This station is in the most crowded and trafficked area of Dubai and considering the location in the heart of the old Souk there was absolutely no parking available. Frantic searching revealed a paid parking lot which also appeared to be full, but the attendant allowed us to double park as it was a police case.

 

Once inside the station we were told to wait as they were busy.

 

Lock up

 

I also learnt what I always knew – do not act smart with the Police.

 

There was a case ahead of us and the two guys involved were obviously at loggerheads. They kept going in and out of the office arguing and one of the guys was particularly agitated. The police threw both of them out of the office and asked them to wait. The guy who it seemed was at fault was having quite a fit. As they could not agree on how it happened and who was responsible, the cops told them to head back to where the accident happened and wait there. They would need to recreate the scenario on site, which probably meant that the rest of the day was gone for the two of them. At this juncture one of them stormed out of the office saying that he was leaving.  

 

A police station is a public place and seeing this drama unfold in front of us, the chap in our group who was already miffed started to throw a tantrum as well. His point was that we should have waited at the accident site despite what the cop there told us and that we were just being given a runaround. He started to gesticulate aggressively complaining that he did not have the time and that he was leaving. Obviously the driver of the vehicle who he had banged into could not allow that, and an argument broke out between them.

 

The taxi driver and I were just watching this mutely.

 

Coming back to the other guys, when the guy at fault threatened to drive away, the other chap marched straight into the cop’s office to complain. The cop came out and asked that guy to come back. Gesturing and spouting some gibberish that guy tried to intimidate the cop. Seeing this belligerence, the cop just casually took this man by his elbow and marched him behind into a holding cell and locked him up. I was absolutely stunned!

 

I was reassured by the taxi driver that he would be kept in there till he calmed down. In most likelihood he would be let out after ten to fifteen minutes. Funny thing is that on seeing this scenario unravel, the guy in our group who was acting up calmed down immediately. After that he was a model of reasonableness and good behavior.

 

Insurance

 

Lastly I learned how important it is to have a Car Rental clause in my Insurance contract. My car would be taken to the workshop and probably be under repair for a week at least. So even though I was not at fault I would still be without a car for quite a while. With my wife and I working at disparate locations, having two cars is a necessity and even though insurance would cover for the damage to the car, I would still be out of pocket for the number of days that I would have to hire a car. Considering the damage and weekend days lost, it could even be ten to fifteen days!

 

To rub salt to my wounds, when I went to drop off the car to the Agency body shop, I was informed that the Insurance Company of the driver at fault would have to approve the quotation for the damage. According to law they are given three working days, and with a weekend thrown in could go up to five days. That means that my car would not be touched for those three to five days until that approval was received - parts would not be ordered and no work started.

 

What made it worse was that - had it been my fault, had I caused the accident - my insurance company would have given the approval immediately, thereby saving me the rental costs for those days. (Of course my no claims bonus would be impacted – a classic lose / lose scenario).

 

Aaarghhh!!!!!!

So why do I persist in writing this Blog?

Dear Reader,

 

This will be the 100^th article I publish and I thought it might be worthwhile to reflect on the reasons I write.

Last year my wife bound a booklet of my articles for my Dad (since he does not have access to a computer). Looking at the size of that binder made me realize how much I have actually written. My guess is that I have penned in excess of a hundred thousand words, which amounts to a sizeable (even if not very enjoyable) book.

Possibly having noticed it in the living room back home, his friends must have scanned through the same. So last December when I met them in Bombay they asked me as to - why I write, where do I get my ideas, when do I get the time, etc.? From their tone it seemed that they thought it to be a futile endeavor.

I guess from their point of view, since I was not planning on becoming a writer - why bother? With refreshing honesty they indicated that some articles were long-winded, topics had no relevance and that reading was a dying habit. With TV, FB and Twitter - who had the desire to read anything over 143 characters? I did not have an answer for them!

I realize that I am not writing as an expert nor is it a personal diary. My blogs do not fit neatly into any particular category. They are neither technical nor fictional. They are a jumble of everything and nothing.

Individual Expression

Anyway I started writing because of an urge to articulate and communicate. I realized that, in general conversations had become muted and subdued. Debates, arguments and discussions that defined my college and internship days and my early working life had withered away.

 

I did understand that there could be a variety of reasons for that.

Maybe it is the times we live in that make it difficult to argue and debate issues without offending, alienating or boring someone. Maybe beyond a certain size Group conversations just cannot aspire to get above ground level. It could be that we do not meet often enough to get past the safe topics and delve deeper into a contentious one. It might be that we are too distracted by the tech toys that have taken over, or that we are too comfortable in our mental paradigms to explore outwards. Probably after hard days at work and the stresses endured, a serious discussion is neither desired nor appreciated. (Strangely I find that 'I' get energized with a lively exchange.)

Whatever the reason, I prefer to believe that it is one of the above, rather than a vacuity of thought and opinions!

 

So when people ‘do’ meet in social settings, they tend to skirt around getting personal. There is an inherent embarrassment to intrude and ask pointed questions. Conversations are steered towards more benign topics - like food, gossip and movies. There is safety in skipping from one topic to another, rather than have a prolonged discussion on one. There is also an evident preference to focus on the trivia in our lives, thus avoiding the bigger picture.

As a result the art of conversation has suffered and become impoverished. Views when expressed are couched, understanding and acceptance of differing opinions diminished. As bits and bytes of nonsense assault us from all sides, our attention spans have narrowed and consequently we have lost the ability to distinguish information from knowledge and intelligence from wisdom.

I enjoy a good discussion or debate and believe that an argument often clears the air. Having a philosophical bend of mind, I find it disturbing that the very term “Philosopher” has taken on a negative connotation with many. Do not be a “philsooph yaar” – is a common refrain! A Philosopher is a seeker of knowledge – how the hell is that bad?

Anyway I want to give people pause to think and would love them to do the same to me. I want to influence and be influenced, to correct and be corrected, to illuminate and be illuminated in turn.

This blog started as an attempt to meet one side of that equation.

Public Diary

 

Then (much to my amazement) as I continued to write, it started to become a sort of diary.

I would record my thoughts, feelings and experiences and reflect on them later. My memory for events and places is leaky at best and this bog could serve as a journal. Reading my early blogs now amazes me at how some of my views have changed and some not at all. My memory for events and places is leaky at best, but going back and reading my diarized experiences brings them back to life in vivid detail.

I also found that writing about my childhood and early days in Dubai, actually brings those days back into focus - gets my memories refreshed so to speak! Having grown up in a close circle of friends, we shared a lot of those early experiences. Our memories were maintained through shared recollections and collective association. In those days I took for granted the process of keeping our experiences alive by constant repetition. Not having those friends around to reminisce with has dimmed those memories, making it hard work to dredge them out.

 

Having written about some of those incidents in my blogs, as I was drifting down nostalgia lane, I have provided those memories a permanence that is denied the author. Friends who played a part in those memories will either curse me for bringing them out of the closet or laugh with me, and the rest will just enjoy them as a sideshow.

Personal Communiqué

 

And now this blog is also about keeping connected. My family and friends are scattered around the world, and not being very good at keeping in touch (through phones, social media, emails or letters) I find this a good way to keep them updated.

 

I know that Facebook is the current favorite medium, but I have somehow not yet mastered the ability to condense my message in a few words. In that world, one-liners and snappy comebacks abound, interspersed with pictures - basically that platform is for the young and the quick witted. I need the space that this forum provides to express myself. It takes me a few hundred words to get warmed up, and more than a thousand to wrap up. This same ineptitude then takes care of the SMS and Twitter platforms for me as well.

In my blog every article opens a window into my thoughts or lets you in on my life. Sometimes I feel it leaves me bare and defenseless - devoid of pretence and also open to misinterpretation. But therein lies the beauty of this medium! Just as it allows me enough space to express myself, it also provides enough rope to the reader to hang me.

This journey is still evolving and it is possible that it will morph further. It may stop entirely or stabilize on one path. But if through my writing I can amuse you, make you ponder, or let you in a bit deeper into my life, then that is as good a reason as I can think of.

 

In the end, I guess I write because I can.