Hey Tush,
Wow - graduating from High School huh? And turning eighteen - all at the same time.
Until a few years ago I did not even know what High School meant. But then I did not know so many things that I know now - a lot of them because of you. Of course I still do not know "many" things - but then that is neither here nor there, and probably the reason why one studies earlier on and then continues to learn all through life.
Anyway I am not going to harp too much on this High School graduation - because I think that would be an insult to someone with your aspirations and capacity. To congratulate you on something as mundane as this would be supercilious and condescending. I know that this is just the first small step to the great life that awaits you.
Instead I will focus on your turning eighteen and on you and me - a son and his father! And that is where I am really struggling baby boy. Struggling to say meaningful things, struggling to keep my emotions in check and of course struggling to cope with (in my mind at least) the inexorable strides of time.
Speaking of time - where the hell did the time go? Like a furtive thief it slipped by me, without me even noticing. But unlike a common thief it took away my most valuable possession - time.
When did you change from my little baby-boy to the strapping and handsome youth in front of me?
When did you transition from the lad trying valiantly to keep up with me on our runs together, to this youth who easily outstrips his Dad?
I really want to know that point when we changed roles - from my 'telling' you what to do, to my 'asking' you what should be done. That point - when I was flummoxed and I turned to you for the first time to see if you knew the answer.
The thing is, however that these transitions were so smooth, so effortless, that one hardly felt the shift in gear. And that has been the way with you in everything that you have ever sought to achieve. Quietly and under the radar, your determination and your will to succeed would vanquish whatever devils that you sought to fight that particular day.
Even the transition point from a happy and cheerful child with the most engaging laugh, to the intense and serious teenager is almost impossible to pinpoint. There was no watershed moment when I felt that you had passed from one stage of life into another.
Minimum fuss, maximum impact - that is what you are.
I have felt that the last few years have been difficult for me predominantly because of my work status. But when I actually think about it, these days could not have come at a better time. They rewarded me with the greatest gift a Dad can have - the time to spend with his son!
At the end of it all - I have said all that I have wanted to tell you (and more) in our "talks". Of course you know I mean my "lectures"!! I really feel like I have nothing to impart on such a momentous occasion in your life. Like a marathon runner who has run so much on his practice runs, that there is no juice left on race day!
Truly you have never disappointed me - EVER! If at any point in time you have felt that you did - it was entirely due to the fact that ever since I can remember I have thought of you as an adult. Even as a ten year old, your demeanor and poise made me treat you as one much older. I did not let the young boy that you were, linger around for too long - because I was in a hurry to meet the man you would become. As a father I kept setting standards and you kept exceeding them.
The values and principles that define you - the entire package that is Tushar Shroff is just amazing (and that is not just coming from your father).
I love you baby boy - more than I can express and more than you can know.
I am also extremely proud of you - my heart swells every time I think of you.
BUT even more than the love and the pride - I feel BLESSED for having you in my life. If it is true that we select the parents we get born to - then your Mum and I owe you a big THANK YOU and an immense debt of gratitude for choosing us.
Yours always,
Dad
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